6 weeks post op update with pics....

Okay so today i'm 6 weeks post op and i guess it's time for more picture comparisons and an update...
i went back to the YMCA last night for my first "real" workout. i did 3 miles on the elliptical in just under 28 mins and then took renee's spin class i used to take every thurs night....it felt amazing to push myself and not have any pain or worry of pain...it felt even better to see a 3000+ calorie burn on my BMF readout too :)

i would say that i am 90% healed with no more swelling. i've stopped wearing the compression garments including the spanx and am back to wearing just my regular underwear under my clothes...it feels weird with the fabric on my skin since i dont have all my feeling back in my midsection (it may never come back completely)....my scar is completely healed and flat....i asked about using the scarguard cream the dr recommends prior to the surgery and he said it's not necessary as my scar more than likely wont look any better than it does right now (meaning it looks pretty damn good and flat)....my bottoms fit but not "right"....my butt and thighs gained while i was not working out the last 6 wks so things feel tight there but are loose around my waist making things not feel quite right yet...i'm holding off on buying any new clothes until i feel like everything i have now doesnt fit right anymore cause they are too loose everywhere.....

this morning i put 5 workouts on my weekly calendar with 2 short runs, 1 long run, 2 cross training days with either spin class, zumba and/or lifting weights and 2 rest days......i'm going to "officially" start a 12wk training program for the 2013 disney princess 1/2 marathon on dec 2nd but until then i'm pretty much following the workout schedule, just doing 4 miles on my "long run" days with no build up so when i hit 12/2 and i have to do a 4 mile long run i will be able to and then build from there.....my friend kara has decided to join me in the princess race and i'm very excited to train and plan on running the entire event with her versus doing run/walk intervals like my past 2 races....

pre-op compared to 3 weeks compared to 6 weeks

2007-2012 Halloween Comparison Pic

Halloween Pics from 2007-2012

Update after 3rd aspiration (3wks 4days post op)

More fluid aspirated today but less than the two times last week. This is promising. We are hoping just one more time on friday and then I should be done with this nonsense. It's not painful but pretty uncomfortable. This pocket was higher than the last two so maybe I'm healing down in the lower area where most of the work was done???

I have a small "pull" feeling in the muscles on my left lower abdominal side area. He said it's normal due to the repair he did and it should fade but other pulls may pop up as I heal.

Incision is looking awesome, all scabbing is gone and I'm pretty much all healed up on the outside anyway. Just need to be patient with the inside stuff I guess.

Hoping to start back walking next week a few days and then the following week start a month of slow building up of my running do I can hit the ground running - hehe pun intended ;-) November 26th with a 12 wk training program for the Princess 1/2 marathon on February 24, 2013.
I miss Zumba and spin classes as well as weight lifting so those will be added back in slowly over the coming weeks.

I promise I will not overdo it.

3 wks post op w/pics...

Front comparison

Side comparison

Well I'm officially 3wks post as of right about now :)

I had the drain taken out last Thursday afternoon (10/4) and all was fine until Monday afternoon (10/8) when I noticed that there was some fluid starting to collect on my left side and just below my incision above my pubic area. I called the Dr's office and they said to keep an eye on it but more than likely I'd have to come up to have it aspirated (needle stuck thru my skin into the fluid pocket and then suck the fluid out with a syringe). It continued to swell on my left side thru Tuesday so I went up Wednesday on my lunch break and had 80ccs removed. He was quite surprised by the amount and said we would more than likely have to do that at least one more time, maybe up to 2. To keep an eye on it again and come Friday if I noticed more swelling and if not wait until Monday. I noticed the swelling starting up again yesterday so I'm headed up there on my lunch again today and hopefully this will be it. My plan is to lay low this weekend as best i can so I can get this skin inside to completely reattach/heal so the fluid stops building up. the needle doesn't really hurt since he numbs the area with another smaller needle full of lidocain lol and I'm still very numb all over down there since the surgery BUT it did feel pretty gross and weird with the needle in there poking around.

Clothes are fitting again for the most part but I do feel like my ass and thighs are getting bigger cause those are the only parts of my pants that are fitting tighter....No worries, I'll get back down once I start working out again. Hoping I can get back to working out sometime after 4 weeks post op....

Anyway, tomorrow is my 40th birthday and I have no idea if we have any plans. Not one person in my family has even acknowledged that tomorrow is my birthday let alone my 40th except my mom who made plans to go out of town to meet her husband who is working in Texas for the weekend. So like I said my plan is to rest up so that the fluid can stop accumulating....

2wks post op pic with clothes....

so i still haven't taken 2wk post op pics undressed but i did have mike take one last night in a new body hugging dress i grabbed from kohl's thurs night....i was a bit self conscious when i left the house but let it go by the time i got to to work....i dont have the horrible lower belly roll or the under my boobs bump anymore and i'm wearing a compression garment and i also had on spanx to make my hips smooth BUT i felt pretty...i even mussed up my hair, added eyeliner, lipstick and perfume for the day....2 more weeks with compression garment and of light walking and then 4wks post op i'm back to working out.....i CAN NOT go longer than a month without working out....it's just not in me anymore.....so i'll start light walking this week for the next 2 and then back to my regularly scheduled program, well within reason, no core work what so ever....gonna have to do some research to figure out which lifting movements will not "hurt" my core....anyway, i'll take "nekkid" pics later today and post comparisons from pre, 3days, 7days and 14day i promise....

13 days post-op

Wooohoooo. I'm 13 days post-op today and was able to have the drain removed. I have to keep an eye on my abdominal area to make sure I'm not building up fluid since the drain is out now.

I have to wear the compression garment another 2 weeks to help with the healing process. Dr. said I can start light exercise now including lighter lifting with more reps if I want BUT nothing with my core - no crunches, no squats or lunges, no deadlifts. I can do walking and/or elliptical/stair master too. He even said I could have sex tonight, just not more than two times.
;-)

I don't go back for another month unless there is a problem with the fluid or my incisions and at that point I'll be 6wks post-op. Scheduled next appt for 11/1 (9yr wedding anniversary).

I feel awesome and am so very happy I decided to go ahead with the surgery. I'll be even happier when I'm all back to "normal".

I'll do 2 wk post-op pics tomorrow night when I get home from work or if I run out of time this weekend for sure.

7 days post op update with pics

update from my 7day post op appt. 

Sorry I forgot to post yesterday after my appt. I took pics but was not on computer to do comparison post.

I got sutures and surgical tape removed. 

I did not have my drain removed as I am still putting out to much fluid to it each day. As soon as 

I'm down to 30cc output each day it can come out. Hoping for Monday if I lay low this weekend it should go down. 

I got a new compression garment - like underwear/spanx with a side zipper/hook thingy. Its like wearing the bottom half of a onsie for grownups lol. 

Another dose of the antibiotic since I still have the drain in. 

He is very happy with my progress and so am I. 

So this weekend will be lots of lounging around so I can get this fluid down and heal up on the inside which is what is causing the draining. 

Oh and I slept in my own bed last night. Mike fell asleep watching tv and I snuck up alone to our bed until like 6 when his snoring ass joined me. It was not as comfortable as I have dreamed about over the last week but I know it will be better when I can lay on both sides - with the drain I'm pretty uncomfortable on my right side still.)

1 week ago...

Just 1 VERY short week ago I left my purse and my cell in the waiting room after giving my husband one of the tightest hugs ever and walked to the back of the surgical center at Esthetica Institute.

I got naked; Dr. Delange drew marks with what I think was a black sharpie on my tummy; got my vitals taken by a nurse named Ashley; had an IV inserted into my arm by a very kind and friendly anesthesiologist named Jennifer and then walked myself across the hall into the operating room.

I remember getting on the table and having warm blankets placed over me and feeling the warmth of the heated table under me. I remember someone saying they were going to strap my arms down on each side of me. Then Jennifer put a mask over my mouth loosely and said she was just giving me some fresh air...

3 hours later I'm walking hunched over like an 80 yr old woman across the hall into a recovery room with a very uncomfortable recliner.

I remember being soooooooo soooooo incredibly HOT. I heard them tell Dr. Delange as he passed the room that my temp was fine but I was "sweating profusely". Then I felt the most incredible tightness in my midsection. It was almost unbearable at that point. Ashley got me a cold towel for my forehead and tried to cool me off and "bring me around". I could not keep my eyes open, I just felt sooooo tired. But that gave me the "spins" and I started to feel sooo completely nauseous, like I have never felt before, and I knew I had to throw up but was sooo afraid of hurting my newly tightened stomach muscles. Ashley kept encouraging me to keep my eyes open and focus on something to help with the queasiness but I just couldn't. And then it came - the first round of vomiting - just bile and dry heaving but ever so painful nonetheless. Then I heard them say, "let's get her husband" and then he was there. Mike was sitting beside me rubbing my arm and holding my hand. I still felt nauseous but was able to have a few sips of water. I started to feel better so I drank more water. After about 20 mins of feeling better and thinking we were going to get ready to be discharged, all of a sudden, I felt another huge wave of nausea and ended up throwing up a second time - all that water I had and it was officially the worst experience ever. I felt the wave come and was alone and remember yelling to Mike and Ashley, "I'm going to throw up AGAIN!!!!" It was horrible. Ashley ended up giving me a shot to help with the queasiness AND then I felt soooo much better pretty quickly after that.

Ashley cleaned me up and helped me get dressed and then she had to head back into another surgery and had a second girl who was wearing a black sparkly Esthetica tshirt and black jeans and a pair of the highest healed shoes I've ever seen, took my IV out and helped me get into our van to head home.

Driving on day 6...

Holy shit I feel like I'm 16 again - driving for the first time today since last Thursday. I was terrified and ended up turning around and not getting a pedicure like I had planned but just getting a sandwich from subway and returning an unopened medicine to Walgreens. I was so nervous and overly cautious.

I did pick up both runts from 2 different schools and grabbed them some dinner before heading home. I'm going to run out in a few minutes to pick up Chinese BUT I'm not going to drive myself to my dr appt tomorrow. It's like 30 mins away and I'm afraid if I get my drain out or sutures removed I might be a little "woozy" and not able to drive "all" that way back home alone. So I'm going up rely on my friend Kara to be my last babysitter for the week. This weekend we will be laying low and hanging around home.

I can't believe it's been a week since my surgery. I swear I must be a freak of nature healing as quickly as I have.

I'll post 7 days since surgery comparison pics tomorrow after my appt hopefully in the afternoon before picking up the runts.

Day 5 post op

Had Mike help me adjust my compression garment this am. The swelling has gone down so much more since yesterday and the day before.

I've been off pain meds since midday Monday due to the constipation issue. I really truly haven't needed them. I only have a sharp pull type pain every once in a while at a suture spot. I sneezed for the first time last night and also dropped a wii remote just below my incision where I had a little lipo, both stopped me in my tracks. I could have vomited with the sudden pain. But luckily it passed and no harm was done. Thank goodness all is well in the bathroom again because I think that was what was causing the majority of my swelling and abdominal pain.

Nick is my helper today as there is no school for him (yom kippur?). So far he has filled my water cup with ice, turned off the lights, put a pillow under my feet and get flushable wipes & toilet paper from the upstairs bathroom. He said he is "my friend helper" for today. I could have been home alone but since he has no school it give us a chance to hang out alone some. We don't get time like this usually with Mike and Emma around.

I go back to the dr on fri and hopefully have my drain removed and maybe some stitches too. I'll take more pictures then for a before surgery-3 day-7day comparison and will post on Friday afternoon.

I'm very happy with my results so far. I have not tried on any of my "real" clothes yet - just wearing workout pants & shorts & my hubby's boxer briefs. It'll be so exciting trying on clothes in my closet that have not ever fit yet. I have a bunch of size 10s that were just toooo tight. I'm thinking not anymore. :-)

pics from day 3 post op

Post-op appt update

Few things from my dr's visit:

No eating until I poop.

Stop taking the Percocet pain pills and switch to Tylenol only to help get things flowing right. I can take the muscle relaxers as they don't cause constipation.

Pain ball was removed.

Drain stays in until at least Friday's appt as long as I have less than 30ccs of fluid over 24hr period.

Keep binder on tight until I see him again on Friday @ 12:15.

I can shower as much as I want just no direct hit with the water on stitches.

Doing well and he says all looks good.

Day 3...

I still can't believe I had my surgery just 3 days ago. I feel good overall but I'm pretty tender on my abdomen near my incision.

I still have not had a real BM just a little bit so that is not a good thing. Hoping stool softener will kick in soon so things get moving more easily.

Kids and mike are gone to school and work and my friend Kerri is on her way to hang with me and take me to my first post-op appt.

I think I'm going to shower before we go so the dr can redress a clean body versus going to appt getting redressed and then coming home and ruining it with a shower.

I'll be able to take a quick peak and maybe a picture or two :-) I'm excited to see what's under all this binding.

Bathroom issues...

I have never had a problem with going to the bathroom - not while preggers or post delivery with either kid. I'm probably one of the most regular people I know lol but since my surgery I have not gone yet and I'm not supposed to let it go too long. So now I'm taking stool softener/laxative plus I did a glycerin suppository a little bit ago. Here's hoping I poop soon!!!!

Day 2 post-op

Last night was better than the first night. Draining has slowed down and the muscle contractions have pretty much stopped unless I move the wrong way. I ended up sleeping on the couch for part of the night cause I just couldn't get comfortable in the recliner. We added another comforter over the chair and it definitely feels more cushiony. Started taking miralax yesterday and then again this am to help me "go to the bathroom" but it's still not happened yet so mike ran out to Walgreens to pick up some senocot and hopefully it'll get moving soon. Looking forward to my dr.'s appt so I can see what is under the binder garment. I have yet to see my flat tummy yet :-)

1st day down.

Home just after 1.
One and only throw up at home before settling into my chair.
Meds and sleep and some tv and more meds lol.

First night has passed. I'm definitely keeping up with the pain and muscle relaxer meds on a tight schedule. The recliner chair works well but it's hard to stay in one position ALL the time. I'm super sore and tight. I didn't sleep well at all so I foresee lots of naps today.

I forgot to share that the dr took off 5lbs & 1 oz of skin and fat.

I have a pain pump but I'm not 100% sure it's working lol.

12 hrs post op....

I feel good. No "real" pain yet. Tight tight tight in all my abdominal areas like I did the best or worst (lol) core workout of my entire life. Starting to feel a little tingly at my incision site but it doesnt hurt persay. Just finished watching last night's glee and now I think I'll take another snooze while
Mike finishing making his dinner. I'm getting sleepy again after taking my medicine. Keeping up with that on a tight schedule for sure. Im not gonna let the pain creep in at all. I have no idea what I look like under the compression garments. But my sweatshirt is wayyyy more loose on the bottom when zipped up. Ahhhh, I have a flat tummy. Wooohoooo. Can't wait to see it.

My befores....

front no clothes

side no clothes

front w.clothes

side w/clothes

It's here...

Today is the big day.

I was awakened at 2 by a screeching cat and a low flying plane and then again at 4 by the same or possibly another cat and a low flying jet.
Couldn't fall back asleep of course. Thinking about today and then just chatting with mike while laying in bed.

I just went and snuggled with nick for a few minutes and he woke up to go pee. I love snuggling with my boy. He told me on the way to the bathroom that he was sorry I was going to be hurting after my surgery. Such a sweet thing. I assured him that I'd be fine and that the worst part would be not being able to lay with them in their beds for a couple of weeks.

Not being able to snuggle with my kids is truly going to be the hardest part. I'm thinking about it and crying as I type. I love them so much and just pray that I am not putting myself at risk to improve my life and health and jeopardizing my life with them. That would be my only regret in life.

Gonna hop in the shower now and then snuggle with my emmadoodle after since she wakes up easier and I want to make sure she gets a little more sleep as I'm already waking them up earlier than usual for grampa to do the morning routine and bring them to school after we leave at 7.

This is it.

At 745 we arrive and meet the anesthesiologist. Surgery should start right after 8. Should be home and resting by 1.

So glad I decided to let the kids go with Kameron.

Start off right and get my rest right from the start and hopefully the rest just falls into place and the healing is quick.

Starting to panic a bit....

i'm at work and i'm planning on staying a bit later today (skipping the gym and my workout) to finish up 2 client billings and make sure all the accts are covered until i return to the office on 10/1 on top of the typical thursday money shuffle to cover payroll that comes out tonight....i dont think i'm going to finish both bills even if i push it and that pisses me off....

i havent been able to get out even for my little bit to finish the 2.58miles i left to finish my september goal...I AM NOT GOING TO STRESS ABOUT THOSE STUPID MILES....seriously i have got to put everything into perspective....

my mind is just reeling with everything and i just want this day to be over so i can go to the dr's office and have this surgery and be done and on my way to healing....the kids are all set for drop off at school by grampa and then with my friend kameron fri night and into sat....the recliner chair was delivered to my house today....

i just need to take a breathe and finish this work so i dont feel compelled to "rush" back to it next week even if it is remotely from my house....i know i'll be feeling better towards the end of the week and will be able to do the other bill if i dont finish it today and i just have to accept that...

i can only do what i can do.....

Wow, just 2 more sleeps...

How did this time go by so fast?
Just 2 more days until my surgery. Full days at work today and tomorrow preparing to be off all next week - client billings, trade checks cut, payroll covered for 2 weeks. Busy busy stuff.

I have printed out a living will and just need to have it witnessed by 2 people to make it official. I also need to dig out the will an attorney made up for us like 8 yrs ago that we never just finalized.

Lift chair is being delivered tomorrow and hopefully Amanda can meet them to accept the delivery so I don't have to run home.

Just keep breathing and believing that what I'm doing is the right thing for me and it is time.

It's really this week???

Oh. My. God.

it's really this week...in just 4 short days i am having my tummy tuck....i'm literally feeling uneasy in my stomach as i type these words.....today i printed out a living will and will execute before friday and provide to my surgeon for my file prior to my surgery....i am working on getting together a will that an attorney did up for mike and i a million years ago either when i was newly pregnant with nick or right after i had him...i never finalized it....i hate hate hate thinking about this kind of stuff but once i have it all complete, i'll never have to worry about it again.....i can move on and get back to my positive thinking because NOTHING is going to go wrong...

i'm going to have this surgery on friday morning...
i'm going to recover amazingly well because i'm just awesome that way...
i'm going to love my new tummy every day for the rest of my life...

wow, just 4 more sleeps and 4 more wake ups and then i'll be headed off to surgery....i deserve this. i earned this. i can't wait for this...

1 more week....

HOLY SHIT.....in just 1 week from right now i will be "waking" up in recovery getting ready to head home after having my tummy tuck...

OMG!!!!!

this is truly happening...i am absolutely 100% committed to making this change to my life forever and this surgery will just cement that decision and "reward" me for all my hard work to date....

i can not express the fear, excitement, anxiety, nervousness, did i mention excitement i feel as the day draws closer....

literally in 1 wk from RIGHT NOW i will have a FLAT TUMMY!!!!!

i'm about to burst out of my seams lol with excitement :)

Pre-Op Appt Today...

so today was my pre-op appt with the nurse and then the plastic surgeon....she and i went over the pre-op and post-op stuff/sheet and got together my prescriptions....then we took my before pictures....wow, 4 views i cant wait to compare to post-op....then i met with dr. delange and he just pretty much showed me where my incision line will be, much lower than i thought which is good because it will also allow for him to "lift" my pubic mound "up" with the tuck as it is puffy/saggy just like my tummy....so i have to shave the top section and then we'll see how it is affected after the surgery and how much "care" will be needed as i think he will be taking part of it out with the skin....i'm super nervous and was feeling very sick in my stomach as i drove to my appt but i'm confident more and more each day that this is the right decision for me....i need this to be done and over with and i will be so much happier with myself and will be able to continue on and "finish" up this process of reaching my goal...

Wow, just 11 more sleeps....

holy shit i'm under 2wks until my surgery and actually feel like it's closer to 1 week away versus 2 lol....

i just had a minor breakdown with tears and everything with my MALE boss lol...seriously...thank god we have worked together for 12yrs or i'm sure he would have fired me by now....

so many worries shuffling through my head:

1. worried about nick and school and behavior issues...
2. worried about my pre-op appt tomorrow knowing my surgery is just 11 days away...
3. worried about getting billings done and out for clients to get money into us before i go out so i can pay as many people as i can so i dont have to worry about cutting checks from home...
4. worried about the damn surgery and not being able to do everything i will need/want to while i'm recovering...
   

yup, i'm one big ball of emotion this afternoon and my very kind and considerate MALE boss got the brunt of it, lucky him :)

all i can do now is just take deep breaths, tackle each issue as it comes and put off as many worries as i can until they can be taken care of....i guess this mental prep is going to be the biggest preparation i have to do before the surgery....

OMG only 2 more wks until my surgery....

wow, it's really starting to settle in that i have just 14 more days until i go to bed and wake up and head to the surgical center for my surgery...just need to get "over" caught up at work next week and then i wont feel so much stress the actual week of my surgery....fortunately i will be able to work remotely from home a bit once i'm feeling up to it.....anyway, getting my lists together of things that need to be done before surgery and who's doing what while i'm recovering....getting the kids situated is my biggest challenge but luckily i have family and friends and my hubby to help figure it all out so it all goes smoothly and i can remain "stress free" hahahaha, yeah right...

Only 17 more sleeps....

holy crap, only 17 more days until my surgery....
did a big BJ's shop yesterday and have the following in the freezer so far:
4 meatloaves
4 marinated stks
2 pks of marinated pork chops
2 dry rub marinated pork loin roasts
1 marinated chuck roast for the crockpot (french dip sandwiches)

tonight i have to do up 30 b/s chix breasts into 5 different recipes, including:
maui chix
chix cordon blue
carribean chix
cheddar/cracker chix
ranch chix parm

this will get my freezer all set up thru october and mike will only have to shop for the essentials like fresh fruit & veggies, dairy and bread while i'm recovering....

Other TO DOS:
i called around about an electric lift recliner to rent to sleep in downstairs after the surgery and it's only $125/month with delivery and pickup....can't beat that so i'm setting up the rental for delivery on 9/20...
i'm going to schedule cleaners to come either a few days before my surgery or tuesday following my surgery while i'm home...
i'm also going to schedule the carpet cleaner to do upstairs and terminex to come for their inspection as well as "spot" treat a baseboard in our room that keeps having droppings in front of it....

i'm going to be home anyway, so why not get all this shit done then right???? lol, not like i have to lift a finger or anything to get this stuff done :)

wow, just 17 more sleeps....

16 yrs of drivers' license pics...

I love to do comparison pics...well today i got a new DL and i have kept my last 2 FL licenses since i moved here in 1996 and asked today if i could keep my expiring one too...she said yes and cut the license and let me keep the pic....

anyway, here are 4 pics from 1996 thru today showing how drastically JUST my face has changed over the last 16 years.....i have no idea what i weighed in 1996 when i moved here but i look pretty big in the face....

first 2 DLs



one i just "gave up" that was expiring


new one....


if i've said it once i've said it a million times...if you are doubting your progress or are disappointed with your loses to date just put old pictures next to new ones....you will SEE how far you have come....and that is more important than what the scale reads out when you step on it naked in your bathroom a million times....

Thinking & thinking & thinking....

many times toooo much thinking gets me in trouble....

i have never had any issues with anxiety or depression before but just thinking about "my list" is starting get me a bit nervous...i have an idea of what i need to get done before my surgery and then there is the list of what i WANT to get done...they dont always match you know....i just need to write it all down in order of importance and then that will be it....i need to get the kids party done and "over with" and then i'll feel better i think....i also have a list of stuff i want to BE done at the house while i'm home since i'm going to be there anyway....termite inspection and treatment, carpets cleaned upstairs, house either cleaned just before my surgery or while i'm home...i think i found a cheap recliner for the living room or bedroom depending on where i decide to be and will be checking it out and picking up hopefully this weekend....i'll get rid of it after if we dont want to keep it....i'm working out the drop off and pick up schedule for the kids and will definitely lean on friends and family to help mike out....luckily he has told his boss that i'm having surgery and he will be in late and/or leave early depending on what's up.....okay i feel a bit better writing it down....breathe denise, just breathe....

All that I do...

Started really thinking about all that I do between work and home (especially home) this morning. Don't get me wrong my husband does a lot to help out around the house and with the kids, but I do the majority and it is going to extremely obvious when I am down and out for a minimum of 10days (as I have set aside for now) after my surgery. That first weekend I hope I'm in such a drugged up state that I won't even be aware of anything going on around me. I just do not want to put my recovery in jeopardy because I "can't let" someone else do all the stuff I typically do. I will just have to sit or better yet, lie back and let things happen around me. I HAVE to so I can be back on my feet in a reasonable amount of time. Just need to keep reminding myself, I DON'T HAVE to do everything.

Why surgery??

i have been heavy most of my life and in jan 2008 after having my 2nd child i decided it was time to get the best me possible...i started eating right and working out and set a goal to drop from 253.8 to 199 in order to consult with a plastic surgeon about a tummy tuck...

my initial goal was do be at 199 by 12/31/08 WELL, i didnt actually hit onederland until 12/25/10...it took me just under 3 yrs to lose the initial 54lbs in order to make my appt...

i saw the surgeon who did my breast reduction (pd for by insurance in 2000) in jan 2011 at about 197lbs...i did not have a warm fuzzy feeling about him doing this surgery as he was trying to push scheduling it when i reached 185-190....my goal is to be in the 140-150 range at the "end" of my journey....i left his office feeling very deflated and set a new goal to reach the 170s by the summer and see another surgeon that a friend had used after 6 pregnancies for a tummy tuck....

i put that appt off even after i hit the mid 170s in july 2011.....i have been in the 170s since....in mid dec 2011 i made the 2nd consult appt for jan 2012 with the new surgeon...

my husband was laid off 3 days before christmas but i kept my appt anyway just to see what the new guy said....he was very excited about my loss (about 80lbs) and wanted to schedule the surgery then as he felt like i had done all the work on my stomach area that i could do....anyway, we didnt have the money, my husband didnt have a job and i just couldnt pull the trigger....i put it off and off and off....my hubby got a new job a few months later and i started thinking about it again....

in july 2012 i called and made the surgery appt for sept 21st....both kids have mid sept birthdays and i wanted to get past them but get it done in september still as my 40th bday is oct 13th....

this is my gift to myself...i have completely changed my life with healthy eating and a great workout ethic...i have struggled with the decision to spend about $8,000 of our savings on ME....

BUT decided i deserve this...this is something i have worked very hard for and we will make it work out....i'm going to get a 12month - 0% interest credit card from our bank and pay monthly for the next 11 months and have it paid off before it comes due and starts accumulating interest....i'll make the payment from what we have in our checking acct and if there isnt enough to cover the payment, i'll "borrow" from our savings....

my husband and my mom are both very worried about the "surgery and anesthesia" while i'm worried about how long i'll be "down"...i have a high threshold for pain but dont want to push it and delay recovery...

4 Weeks and Counting Down

well, the time has come or should i say is coming..

i am officially 4 weeks out from my tummy tuck surgery....

i can not believe that no only did i actually schedule it back in july BUT now it is only 4 weeks away....

i'm nervous...

i'm anxious...

i'm excited...

i'm soooo looking forward to how i will look and feel in the very near future...

it's just around the corner and i'm going to start using this blog to track my feelings up to and after my surgery....

this is my time to have the body i have wanted for so very long....


this is it...

here are 2 pics i took myself in june...i can't wait for the october and november and december pics and all the pictures in my future....  

Response to how did you start???

i got a message last week from a new friend asking how i got started on this journey; what were things like when i first started.
i sent her the following reply and then just now followed up with the 2nd reply because i feel like it is the most imporant part and i left it out before....

Reply #1
<<

What I can offer up is this:
1. make a plan with food and exercise. Make the actual appt with yourself to do your workouts and keep it.
2. Find an exercise or activity that you truly enjoy versus something that is just exercise. If you like a sport than find a team and join up. If you like to dance find a Zumba class or hip hop exercise class. If you like to be outside find a new trail to hike or bike or walk or run.
3. Start getting at least 8 cups of water each day and cut back on sugary drinks. Cut back on diet drinks if you have them.
4. Try very hard to get at least 8hrs of sleep each night.

The biggest thing for me is only give up or add things you can either live with or without forever. Meaning if you like pizza dont cut it out completely, limit it or make healthier choices instead. If you can't work out 7 days a week forever do not even try to keep up that kind of schedule.

Keep things fresh so you don't burn out.

Best of luck on your new journey. This new life is amazing once you get it going.>>>

Reply #2
I forgot to add one thing....

i know that we all measure our success based on how the scale moves especially in the beginning of our journey....it's just the "go to move" as far as progress....after doing this for almost five years i have finally come to realize that my progress and my success should not be measured by the scale ALONE...the scale should be the smallest part of how you measure your progress with the changes you are making for the rest of your life.....
how your clothes fit, how much further you are going on your walks, how much faster you are walking/running, how much more water you are drinking each day, how many more fruits and vegetables you are adding to your diet, how much more protein you are getting in your daily intake, how many inches you are losing ALL OVER, how many days a week you work out, how YOU FEEL....
these are what you should be focusing on especially from the start...these are the things that will keep you moving in the right direction...NEVER once have i put on a pair of pants or shorts that have been a little tighter and said well fuck it i'm gonna have a big mac today for lunch cause i have obviously gained a little - if you step on the scale and see up .5 or up 2.5 or whatever, you are more likely to feel that way though....
when you feel clothes that are little tighter you move your ass to make them feel/fit better....when i close my diary and see i've had a great food and workout day it makes me want the next day to be just as good...but getting on the scale and seeing whatever the movement, good or bad, can often times send you into a bad and not helpful spiral, even if there is a loss because you might have been expecting a greater loss and get pissed about that....

i know, i know, i know it is hard to not focus on the scale especially at the start, i just dont want you to focus too hard on it...that is the one thing i wish someone would have knocked into my head when i first started getting healthy....i did it to lose weight and ended up changing my life instead while losing weight along the way.....your focus has to be on ALL the other things, not just the lbs or Kg you are trying to lose....

best of luck to you,
Denise 

Success...even with a gain....

so we went to maine on vacation from 7/21-8/4 and i did some form of physical activity 9 of the 14 days we were there....i logged over 22 miles between running, walking, nature trails and hiking - even did some lake swimming too...my family was active this year more than any other year BUT of course i ate what i wanted within reason AND i logged all that i ate even if it was estimates or guesstimates based on what was available in the diary list.... anyway, i left for maine at around 176lbs and when i came back i peaked into the low 190s...i was angry and i was frustrated but honestly it didnt really bother me as much as it would have in the past....i know what i have to do now that i'm home and i'm doing it - eating cleaner, getting in my workouts and drinking my water (i slacked on that horribly on vacation)..... i'm back to 186 this am and i changed my ticker to reflect my gain...it was a "pissa" to see my lbs lost jump from 78lbs to 68lbs this morning but it is reality.... last night i was sorting through some old teacher resources in my garage and came across my class picture with my 4th graders for the yr 99-00....over the last 12yrs i have known my weight because i have made a conscious effort to "track" it with many efforts to lose weight...i know my highest ever was in sept 2005 at my son's 1st bday party at 263lbs....my "memory" of my body really only goes back to then (2005)... i had forgotten how big i was before i gained with meeting my husband and then having my kids.... anyway, this picture that i found last night compared to a family picture we took on our vacation a few weeks ago after climbing 1300+ft to the top of a mountain is proof that it doesnt matter that i gained weight over vacation or that i'm still holding onto it right now....what matters is that i have changed my life, i'm actually teary typing this - i climbed a freaking mountain (a small to medium sized one but a mountain all the same) and i brought my kids and my hubby along for the ride....this is what this journey has been about for me this time.... THIS IS MY LIFE...i want to be the healthiest mom, wife, daughter, sister, friend, WOMAN i can be.....

5 Years of Father's Day Pics...

here we go again lol....
anyone who knows me, knows i love photo comparisons...there are certain pictures i "force" my family to take each year LOL...mother's day, father's day, fourth of july, birthdays, halloween @ the pumpkin patch and christmas....for me the best way to see how far i have come is to compare from year to year...recently i have gone back 4-5 years to compare where i was when i started my journey to now....if you do not look back at your old pictures and feel like you are struggling and dont see the results of all your hard work, i highly recommend making a collage to compare old you to new you.....it will be eye opening, i promise...
 

How I plan my monthly menu...

             A few people have asked me how I plan and prep meals in advance each month so I decided to share in a blog so it shows up on my wall lol if you are interested.

 

               I pick the meals I want to make from a binder of recipes I have collected over the last couple of years. Many recipes come from the books “don’t panic, dinner’s in the freezer” and “more don’t panic dinner’s in the freezer”. I also have many Skinnytaste by Gina recipes as well as some from magazines or cookbooks or that I have found online….

 

I typically need 4-5 meals depending on the week. Thursdays are always Chinese takeout and Fridays and Saturdays are usually TBD with kids eating free choice and Mike and I eating leftovers, burgers or sandwiches depending on our plans. One Tuesday a month, the kids and I do kids eat free at Applebee's and Mike has a meeting. I know what my workouts are supposed to be for each day/night so I try not to plan heavy meals for those nights but instead Mondays which are my rest nights. Having a schedule has been the key to this working well in our house. Also having a hubby who works from home who is able to pop stuff in the oven has helped too. He might be moving to a job out of the house soon so we may have to adjust and have showers and pjs before dinner if one of us has to start dinner when we walk in at 6. But we'll cross that bridge later if we have to.

 

Every other month I do a day of menu planning, grocery list, shopping & meal prep. I shop at bjs first for all the meats and whatever else I need in bulk from there. Then I hit up Publix for my other groceries including fruit, veggies and dairy plus whatever is b1g1. I end up shopping at Publix about every 10 days or so for milk, fruit and fresh veggies to replenish the fridge or if there are great b1g1 sales on snacks or staple pantry items.

 

I come home and unload and leave all my meat in a big cooler in my kitchen. I make each type of meat together and clean up in between to avoid cross contamination (pork with chix with beef). I'll typically make 3-4 chix dishes, 2-3 pork dishes, 2-4 meatloaves and then marinate 2-4 steaks. I bag each meal up and stick in our garage freezer after labeling the bags with the date and the recipe name. 

 

I sometimes make a big batch of chili on that day too for individual lunch portions for the freezer. That is the only thing I cook though. All the meals I make are just seasoned or marinated meat that freeze then thaw and are cooked on the day they are on the calendar. I usually take out all the meat from the freezer for the week on Sunday night to thaw during the week based on the menu.  

 

The 2nd month I plan based on what meals I have leftover in the freezer plus whatever "plain" meats I have in there. 

 

I try to only do one crockpot meal per month because my kids don't like "mixed" dishes. I always have fresh veggies and fruit for each meal. I buy extra chix and pork chops to cook plain as nick is fussy about sauces. So even though I'm making "2" things it's really the same. We eat seasoned chix, he eats plain - but it's all chicken. 

             Hope that helps….please ask if you have any questions

6 years of mother's day pics...

for me the best way to see my progress is to look at pictures from year to year...
i went back and looked at mother's day pics from 2007 on in my computer at work and in online photo albums...
2007 - I was 4+ months preggers with my daughter and it's the only pic i had readily available - it's of me in the pool with my son versus a family photo for mother's day (i may have more at home in the computer but this worked)
I started my journey in January 2008 when my daughter was 3 months old....
We have been going to lake worth beach since mother's day 2008 when my daughter was 8 months and my son was 3 1/2....
I love this family tradition and I love taking family pics every year...here is a collage of 2007- 2012...
i swear by picture comparisons to truly SEE where you have come from...
2007 - 2012 Mother's Day Comparison

Merrell Down & Dirty 10K Mud Run

I'm participating in the Merrell Down & Dirty 10K Mud Run on Sunday morning in Miami with a group of 5-6 other runners.....i'm excited but nervous and thought I'd share the course info with you all...
Here's the 10K Course Description

Mile 1 -The entire course is fast and flat and the first mile is no exception! Runners race on dirt and limestone tails that wind around the perimeter of Zoo Miami and the surrounding forests.

Mile 2 -Mile two continues on the perimeter trail. On the runners left is a moat and on the right are thick woods. The trail opens into a field of avocado trees at the 5K/10K split. 10K’ers continue down the perimeter trail as the 5K turns and heads back through the inner zoo trails.

Mile 3 -Runners are back on the perimeter trail with a great opportunity to make up some time or put some distance between themselves and the racer behind them.

Mile 4 -Mile 4 takes runners through a brief section of trails in Larry and Penny Thompson Park and then around the beautiful lake situated outside of the animal enclosures at Zoo Miami. Keep an eye out for animals!

Mile 5 -As runners make their way around the lake, they will have to opportunity to witness the exotic wildlife of the Zoo off to the left side.

Mile 6 -The 10K course joins the 5K course just past the open field and finishes with a straight away sprint before emerging from the trees and getting into the mud

Here's the obstacle list:

5' Walls

These walls are 5 feet tall and require athletes to climb up and over. The walls are smooth and do not have foot holds.  No aid station at this obstacle.

The High Wall (Ladder Style) will stand 8’ tall and consist of beams that run parallel to the ground creating a ladder. Racers will climb up and over the structure.  No aid station at this obstacle.

The Tunnels Obstacles is a series of cloth tubes that require athletes to crawl the tunnel length. No aid station at this location.

The Low Crawl Obstacle is a cargo net about 16 inches off the group requiring athletes to crawl the length of the obstacle.   No aid station at this obstacle.

Inflatables + Aid Station - Look out!  This monster is 20 feet high.  Racers will climb over a wall that will have a cargo net on it to assist them to the top before they slide down the backside of the wall. Aid station at this obstacle.

Tires - This obstacle will consist of 100+ tires in a row. Racers will have to navigate the tires as fast as possible.  No aid station at this obstacle.

Water Crossing - Racers plunge through waist deep water. Although participants will not have to swim the will GET WET! No aid station at this obstacle.

The Marine Hurdles Obstacles is a series of horizontal hurdles at about five feet of the group. This hurdle requires athletes to swing a leg up and over the hurdle. No aid station at this obstacle. 
Sandbag Carry - Participants must carry a 20-40lb sand bag across a designated distance. Any grip is allowed as long as racers do not let the sand bag touch the ground. There is no aid station at this obstacle.
The monkey cross is a 24’ wide, 20’ long box. Participants will cross the 20 gap using a 2” slackline under their feet and a 1” rope above their heads.   There is an aid station at this obstacle.
Balance Beams - The balance beams are 2’ and 3’ from ground level and each participants will have to walk along the top of two beams, lined up end to end. Each beam is 4” wide and 12’ long. There is no aid station at this obstacle.
The Mud Pit Obstacle requires athletes to crawl underneath the flagging the length of the mud pit. No going around! It's time to get dirty!   No aid station at this obstacle.
The Low Wall Obstacles is about four feet tall and requires athletes to climb over. The walls are smooth and do not have foot holds.   Aid station exists at this obstacle.

The Cargo Climb is an 8 foot high structure which requires races to approach the cargo net and proceed to climb over the structure using the netting as their ladder.  No aid station at this obstacle.

High Wall - Racer will summit a 10’ tall vertical wall with climbing holds to assist the racer to the top. Once over the wall participants will land on a platform 6’ off the ground before making their way to the ground. For racers hesitant to scale the 10’ wall there is an 8’ option as well. No aid station at this obstacle.

The Slippery Mountain Obstacles requires users to enter the obstacle under the flagging then assisted by a rope, crawl to the top of the sloped surface and step down the other side.   No aid station ...

The Final Mud Pit Obstacle requires athletes to crawl beneath the flagging the length of the mud pit. No going around! It's time to get even dirtier! Don't worry you can shower off just past the finish line.

Words of Encouragement to Stay the Course...

I got the following message from a friend here on MFP and after writing her a very long response, i decided that i would share both with you...i think that if what i said to her can help someone else than it is only fair i share :~)
so here you go....
FROM A FRIEND ON MFP
<<<<>>>>

MY RESPONSE
i have been on this path for just over 4 years.....i have lost 81lbs in that time and still have about 28lbs left to be at the middle of my goal range (140-150)...

when i started in 2008 i wanted to lose 53.8lbs the first year....it was a a ridiculous goal but it was where my head was at - at the time....anyway, my first BIG goal of 199 was not reached until december 2010 - a FULL 3 years after i started BUTTTTTTTTT, i never wavered in my drive to get there or to become healthy in the meantime...this is what was different "THIS TIME".....

every single thing i have done over the last 4 years is something i can live with for the rest of my life - if i added something to my diet or workout regiment than i have to be able to live with it...the same can be said for the deleted stuff....
----->>>>i refuse to give up the foods i like, drinking diet coke, having an occasional glass of wine, eating potato chips or a slice of pizza - i have just learned FINALLY that everything in moderation is the ONLY way to be successful - it's how the skinny or regular people around me do it every day....so why not me???
----->>>>if i start a new workout or pick up a new plan, i have to be able to stick it out - i am not going to be in the gym 4hrs a day/7days a week - i have 2 young kids, i work full time and i want to have a life.....so, i have chosen programs i can do in the time that i have - i workout 6 days a week with 1 day of rest...right now i am just finishing up the 1/2 marathon training (race is 2/26 in disney) and i do a wt lifting program called new rules of lifting for women 2 times a week....i work out 3 nights a week - 2 nights after my runts go to bed and 1 night while they are home with daddy, i run 1 day a week during my lunch hour, i go to the Y or the gym on saturdays and i do a "long" run on sundays as part of my training....once my race is over i'll readjust my schedule to include less running and i might pick up biking....at one point i was doing dble workouts pretty much every day during the week - walking/running at lunch and then my planned night time workouts - i loved the HUGE burns but it burned my ass out and i had to give it up.....now i take a lunch time walk if i need a break from the office BUT i dont count on it as part of my daily burn goal until after i complete it (if that makes sense)....

you have to "flip" your way of thinking and make this a total part of your life - you are NOT on a diet, you should not be "trying to just lose weight"....you should be changing your current/old life to the become the life that you want to have forever.....be the person you want to be and then the weight will come off.....

i've been in the mid to low 170s since july of last year LOL...i guess you could say i'm on a bit of a plateau but i dont really see it that way lol...although i have been maintaining this weight for sooooooo long, i have gained soooo many other amazing "experience" or non scale victories during that time....i have been told many times that i do not look like i am still in the 170s but i am....i just bought M exercise pants, i wear M shirts and 10 and 12 pants, i bought a M dress and it looks great, my arms are toned, i'm assuming my back and ass do to since my hubby has taken notice recently LOL....i am getting firmer and i love how i feel.....
the lbs are not dropping for me BUT FOR ONCE in my life while trying to lose weight i let go of that goal....i'm just not trying to "lose the weight" anymore....it will come off when it wants to come off, in the meantime i'm going to live my life the way i want to life my life and continue to be happy and healthy with my family for many many many more years to come....and i'm going to celebrate every single NSV and let the scale do it's own thing....i can not be discouraged with my progress and NEITHER CAN YOU!!!! if you are doing what you should be doing, the rest WILL fall into place, i promise...it might not be tomorrow, it might not be next week, it might not even be within this year BUT it will come...and who knows maybe along the way you'll realize that what you are striving towards isnt really where you need to end up....what the hell is a number on the scale anyway??? it can change after drinking a glass of water, it can change after taking a dump, it can change after eating an apple or a cookie or a salad - all these things are part of life - the scale does not own you....

Re-working schedules, AGAIN!!!!

okay well it seems it might be time for me to readjust my workout schedule....some things at home have changed; hubby got a new job (YEAHHHH), kids not going to my mom's on thurs nights (BLAHHHHH)....
hubby is working out of the house this week but will begin working remotely from home again next week if all goes as planned....i really just need to sit down the calendar, look at my workouts as planned and decide where to move stuff around but we have been in such a great routine for so long now, i'm finding it hard to be more flexible and less rigid lol....this is a flaw i am working on LOL....
just gotta do it....

2012 Race for the Cure....

Yesterday I registered for the 2012 Race for the Cure 5K "competitive" run on January 28th.....

Here is the link to my page if anyone wants to donation to the cause....
http://www.komensouthflorida.org/2012rftc/dkeeley
I just looked back at my results from the 2011 5K run (it was my first 5K that i ran the entire way - no intervals)...i completed the race in 36:04...this year my only goal is to better that time....anything less will be a success....
WELL, finishing the damn race will be a success lol, but anything less would be even better :~)